When word came out that there was going to be a
reboot/sequel of Jurassic Park, I dusted
off my well-worn sceptical hat and sat, arms folded, waiting for a raptor to disappoint
me with a predictable attack from the side.
The law of diminishing returns had surely sent the franchise the way of
its subject matter after Spielberg low-point The Lost World and the forgettable bollocks that was Jurassic Park 3.
As frequently happens, I was wrong and 2015’s Jurassic World turned out to be loads of
fun. They took a chance on director
Colin Trevorrow, a man with one cinematic release to his name at the time, and
he engineered something both enjoyably familiar (Jurassic Park’s legacy woven into the DNA rather than in cheap
callbacks) and surprising enough to offer thrills. The best thing about it was the characters:
Chris Pratt cemented his place as a leading man with roguish dino trainer Owen,
and enjoyed good odd couple chemistry with Bryce Dallas Howard’s uptight
Claire. Both were likeable and fun, and
even the imperilled kids weren’t huge irritants like in previous films. Ifran Kahn was quietly charismatic as the
Richard Attenborough proxy. Bad guy
duties (the human ones, anyway – think mayor from Jaws) were handled by the immense talents of Vincent D’Onofrio, who
made his military stooge more than a one-note raptor snack.
Naturally, huge success whetted studio appetite for sequels
and with Treverrow decamping to join (and the leave) the Star Wars galaxy, J.A. Bayona was drafted in to marshal the
carnage. A hugely disappointing trailer
set internet tongues wagging, their main subject being “why didn’t they know
the island was a volcano?” This detail
is brushed aside in the film, but the volcano provides a decent ticking clock
for the first half, in which Owen and Claire (and a couple of hugely annoying
helpers with silly job titles) are drafted back to the island as part of a
rescue operation which to the surprise of absolutely nobody turns out to be a
flimsy excuse for making weapons out of dinos, and more genetic tinkering.
Rafe Spall’s character, Eli, is looking after Ingen’s
interests for the infirm James Cromwell, who was Richard Attenborough’s silent
partner. We find out that he’s a wrong
‘un early on when he shouts at a child, and he’s a dial-a-villain
throughout. Spall is a charming and
charismatic actor but he doesn’t have a lot to work with here. Doing more with less is Toby Jones (a man
genetically incapable of playing a nice guy), whose smug auctioneer is
particularly hateable and the film seemingly takes sadistic glee with his
fate. The scumbags’ gallery is rounded
off by Ted Levine, playing a greedy ex-military man. Levine brings authority and that voice but is a little underused,
marshalling what looks like the same group of muscly mercenaries from Logan and being all gruff and stuff.
If you’re wondering why I haven’t bothered with Owen and
Claire much throughout this review, it’s because the film isn’t really bothered
with them either. Their relationship, so
well established in the first (or is that 4th) film, is undercooked
here and despite a few hints of what happened between the films, it’s as if Fallen Kingdom doesn’t really have room
for them. The strength of Jurassics Park and World was in the main characters; likeable and able, yet only
really able to run away from danger, occasionally protecting a child. Goldblum, Neill, Dern, Pratt, and Howard all
give us something to root for among the chaos.
Here, we have some bants and a bit of peril, but they feel like an
afterthought.
Plot-wise, it’s somewhere between a juggernaut and a clown
car. There is so much going on at such a
high pace but so little of makes any narrative sense – a churlish argument when
discussing a film about genetically engineered dinosaurs, I know – but it’s not
as satisfying as the imperilled kids motif that drove the best parts of the
previous films. Eli wants to ‘rescue’
the dinosaurs, sell them on to generate seed money for a project to engineer a
new weaponized dino, which is already mostly complete, but needs super Raptor
Blue as a kind of mother figure.
While they have admirably tried to build on and deepen
Blue’s relationship with Owen, they have somewhat retconned Blue into a more
empathetic and intelligent creature than she was before, and this doesn’t quite
work. And ultimately, the Indoraptor , a
hybrid of World’s Indominous Rex and
a velociraptor (strange, considering that Indominous was part raptor to begin
with), isn’t much of a threat. Not
showing up until more than half way through, it’s smaller and spikier than the
previous film’s new dino, and it isn’t as well developed. Its first kill, spotted from a mile off,
shows off some possum DNA in the mix, and there’s an underused laser targeting
motif. It looks pretty cool, but feels
like a step down from the previous film, in which T-Rex and raptor alike were
no match for the Big Bad. Here, somewhat
predictably, it’s Blue to the rescue and this feels cheap.
Despite all the negativity there are plenty of things to like about Fallen Kingdom. It works
nicely as a horror film, it’s loads of fun, and there will always be a piece of
childhood glee which wakes up whenever I see a dinosaur chasing an
asshole. However, while World wore nostalgia on its sleeve, but
gave you enough new thrill, Fallen
Kingdom hopes nostalgia alone is enough to carry a whole film. This is going to be disappointing and
predictable, but I’m going to say it anyway because it’s apt: Fallen Kingdom lacks a bit of bite.
