Monday 12 October 2015

Blockbusted Part 2 - Androids and Dinosaurs

Blockbusted Part 2 - Androids and Dinosaurs

Anyone who read my last article, decrying the lack of originality in blockbuster cinema, should not interpret it as a statement of preference for independent cinema. I'm not going to start bleating on about obscure French auteurs and brave new voices in moody Scandinavian drama, or how Shane Carruth is going to save cinema. I still love a blockbuster: one of those films that gets your blood pumping, your eyes open that little bit wider. Let's face it, would you rather pay what is now bordering on a tenner to sit in the dark among a legion of rude-to-the-point-of-offensive teenagers, and feet sticking to the floor to watch the new Woody Allen movie, or watch Captain America and Iron Man throw down? Be honest...

Don't get me wrong, I love Woody Allen; few directors see the world as the horrible Godless place that it is like Woody Allen does. But this article isn't about introspective drama and meditations on the human condition, as littered with zingers as they may be; no, this article is about explosions, insane stunts, implausibly attractive women and dinosaurs eating children. Actually, Woody...

I participated in a conversation recently (not unheard of for a blogger...) and it got me thinking about how I watch films and why the medium is so important. Over the last year it has been recommended to me several times that I invest in an Android Box. The reason? People know I'm a cinephile and would get a lot of use out of it, watching films for free and thereby depriving the medium from which I derive hours of entertainment and inspiration of much needed revenue. I don't want to get into the ethics or legality of downloading and streaming; I lack both the knowledge and motivation to talk about it. No, I want to talk about the experience of watching a film. Not just a film, but a bloody great blockbuster of a film.

I mentioned in the last article that I went to see Jurassic Park when I was about 12 years old. It's amazing now as it is then and I'm the proud owner of the DVD, but somehow the experience of seeing it now isn't the same as it was for the naïve, pre-critical faculties 12-year-old. Maybe I'm just a cynical mid-30s keyboard warrior. Maybe the weight of the world has long since crushed my fragile spirit, but something has changed. The thrill of Spielberg's masterful use of suspense. The pockets of sheer terror. The virtuoso, almost nonchalant direction, making you love one character and despise another with minimal characterisation, never wanes and never gets old. What I don't get these days is the sense of awe. Remember when you first saw those grazing brontosaurus? When Dr Grant (Sam Neill) stood up in the jeep and removed his hat, just as amazed as you were? When John Williams' score swelled and just owned you? There was a freakin' dinosaur on the screen! Remember the shiver down your spine? That, ladies and gentlemen, is cinema. That moment of awe, that moment where you're always 12 years old. It doesn't happen on DVD.

Naturally, I saw Jurassic World (Colin Trevorrow) this year. And I did it properly: I bought snacks and went to see it at the pictures, and not at home via an internet stream. My home town, Newcastle is lucky enough to have a fine independent cinema, but due to scheduling times I saw this at a frankly disgusting multiplex, complete with sticky floors, horrible children and questionable hot dogs. So in front of a stupendously huge screen, I witnessed a blockbuster done exactly how it should be done. Trevorrow absolutely nails what previous sequel directors Joe Johnson and Spielberg himself failed to manage: the sense of sheer awe, shared by us and the characters. The tracking shot taking us through the window of the Jurassic World Hilton to the first 'reveal' of the park sent shivers up my spine. I was 13 again. That scene where the island's SWAT containment team are effortlessly taken out by a largely unseen creature: efficiently establishing a threat for the audience while adding a nimble 2nd act set piece, it's more Spielberg than Spielberg.

Now, I've asked some of the few people I know if they've seen Jurassic World and an awful lot of them who have, said that they watched it via an internet stream at home. Home cinema is fine by me. Most nights, I will choose a film over television. I have an embarrassingly huge collection of DVDs, but for a childless man in his 30s I suppose I have to spend my heard-earned on something, so it might as be something I love. However, if there's a film out that I expect to be spectacular, impressive, awe-inspiring or just plain huge, then I will make the effort to go see it at the pictures. These people I asked: sure, they know what happens in Jurassic World, (spoiler alert: the dinosaurs get loose, the cute kids don't die) but have they truly seen it? Not the way I have.


This doesn't apply to everything; much depends upon your particular brand of vodka (as Danny Ocean would put it). I'm not likely to go see Woody Allen's latest existential comedy in IMAX, neither am I going to queue in line for popcorn before seeing Noah Baumbach's latest offbeat mumble-core drama about too-cool-for-school New Yorkers. Earlier this week, I saw Ridley Scott's latest sci-fi, The Martian. Did I fire up the Android box and look for the strongest stream? Did I hell. The latest Bond is out this month. Will I be scouring the web for a link so I can see it first? Not a chance. Films like that are made to be seen on a huge scale. When they're done well, they deserve to be experienced in full-on projected glory. I already know James Bond will win; he'll pull the mysterious woman, kill the bad guy, fire off a one-liner and probably have a drink. I already know that; I just need to see it happen 20 feet high in front of me. That's what blockbusters are for.

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